Candle Glow and Mistletoe: Romance on the Oregon Trail Book 5 Read online

  Levi smiled.

  Dawn left the room and came back with paper and string. “We are going to need things to decorate Christmas trees with. Let’s all go sit on the floor in the corner and I’ll show you how.”

  She’d been a worry to Swift Eagle. He wasn’t sure she’d ever get past what had been done to her. But she didn’t show any signs of her experience that he could detect. The children huddled around her and hung on her every word.

  “What are you thinking about?” Luella asked.

  “I was thinking how happy I am for Dawn. I really didn’t think she’d ever marry but look at her. She’s very happy.”

  “She has Heath and Maura. The doctor was worried she could not have a child because of all the beatings. He thought there might be is damage inside.” A smile lifted her lips as she gazed at the small group. “We all help to teach the children and we have Amy. She rotates from house to house helping to clean, and she is the best cook.”

  “Why thank you!” A dark-eyed dark-haired woman said as she put a tray down on the table. “There’s coffee and milk plus a few treats. I’ll get busy with supper; I expect you’ll all be here?”

  “Of course, we will,” Cora answered. “Do you need any help?”

  “I’ve got one of my best girls helping me.” She walked across the room and extended her hand to Swift Eagle. “How do you do? I’m Amy. If you need anything just ask. It’s a genuine pleasure to meet you.”

  Swift Eagle stood and took her hand. “I’m delighted to meet you, Amy.”

  She blushed and quickly glanced in Big Red’s direction. “I have things to do.” She hurried away.

  Swift Eagle glanced at Big Red and shrugged. Big Red wasn’t wearing his usual smile.

  “You never married,” Swift Eagle observed.

  “Well, no but—”

  “Don’t worry about me. I can see how the wind blows.”

  Big Red nodded.

  Rhetta came back out and served the coffee to the adults. She made sure all the children had milk and one cookie each.

  “You must be proud,” Swift Eagle told Big Red. “She has a big heart.”

  He watched as she bent and whispered in Tara’s ear. Tara appeared surprised and somewhat pleased. Then Rhetta put on her coat and left.

  Chapter Two

  Rhetta’s stomach was so knotted she didn’t know if she’d be able to eat a bite. She wished she had never put on the dress. From the way everyone stared, a body’d have thought she’d grown a horn on her forehead. Then there was the big fuss about how nice she looked and by the time they were done she didn’t even want to look at Swift Eagle. She wanted the floor to swallow her up.

  Swift Eagle started to help seat her at the table, sending Rhetta’s heart to galloping like a herd of stampeding horses.

  Out of nowhere, Big Red appeared. “Easy there. This is my job.”

  “Of course,” Swift Eagle said and then sat as far away from her as he could.

  She didn’t say a word at supper, but it didn’t matter; she wouldn’t have been heard over all the chatter. All she wanted to do was to put her buckskins back on, grab her rifle, and go hunting. Things made sense when she was out in the woods hunting. There was always that moment like no other when the wind was blowing, the air was so crisp, and a hush fell around her. Nowadays, she refused to go back to town for any reason. Folks there had made it plain they didn’t want her there, just as they had made certain she knew she was unwelcomed in church. Well, they could make it hard for her to go to church—she sometimes wondered if God even listened to her prayers. He sure had not been watching over her when she was captured.

  As her thoughts drifted, her gaze slid to the man across the room. What did Swift Eagle believe in? There seemed to be many gods in the Indian world. Not that it mattered. She believed what she believed. It wasn’t her concern what others believed, was it? And yet… she wondered about Swift Eagle.

  While she’d been wool gathering supper had ended. As the guests rose from their seats, she hopped up and started to clear the table.

  Tara stood. “Rhetta, honey, you did your share by helping to make supper. I’ll clear the table. Could you play with the children for a little while?”

  “Of course.” She stepped away from the table, put her fingers in her mouth, and whistled. “Anyone under four feet tall needs to come with me.”

  The children all clamored noisily as they vied for a place closest to her side. She knew many children’s games from when she was young and living at home. But the children always wanted to wrestle with her instead. She didn’t mind so much, and she taught them how to defend themselves at the same time, though they didn’t know they were learning anything.

  Now, more than ever, she wished she had kept her buckskins on. She would have felt more comfortable, less awkward. And it would have been much easier to wrestle with the children. She snuck a glance at Swift Eagle and found him gazing at Luella again. It was very clear in his eyes he loved her, but it seemed like he planned to honor her marriage to another man. But it was also clear that he had no interest in anyone else… no interest in her, Rhetta decided.

  Since it no longer mattered how she looked to their guest, she shrugged and started wrestling with the children the way they wanted. She was quick, teaching them in turn to be quick as well. She won very few matches, but she did at least make them work for their win. Even three-year-old Hannah and two-year-old Alex were able to jump on her.

  By the time she called a halt to the activity, telling them they were so much better than she, her hair was hanging down her back, her face was heated, and her dress was wrinkled and askew. She’d had fun, though, and so had the children. That was what mattered.

  No more pretending to be a proper female for her. It was constrictive and time consuming. She liked to cook and sew and all those things, but she also liked to hunt and trap. And sometimes Tara came with them. Tara’s father had been a trapper, and she even had her own buckskins.

  * * *

  It had been a while since he’d seen his friends and he admired the fact they were all so in love with their spouses. It was something he’d seen only once in a great while. Cora and Harrison held hands while Luella and Declan often smiled at each other. It was as though they were communicating with their smiles. Heath kept Dawn close and when he wasn’t near, she searched him out. Even Tara and Zander were affectionate with each other. They seemed an odd match, but there was much love between them. Big Red had feelings for Amy, though he kept them more to himself than the others. And the children were well cared for and well loved by all. They were, some of them, no more than just friends, and yet more than that as well. They were all as close as family.

  Did they know how fortunate they were? Of course, he already knew the answer. So many people had died on the trip to Oregon, he was sure those who made it valued each moment of their lives.

  “Swift Eagle, if you would honor us, we’d like you to say at our house,” Big Red said.

  “Thank you.” He nodded with appreciation as he accepted Big Red’s kind offer. Of all there, he had not known the flaming-haired trapper while on the trail, and yet the man was opening his home so a weary traveler would have a warm place to stay.

  The children around him were all getting sleepy, some already nodding their heads while others sat with eyes forced wide open, fighting against the idea of going to bed. He eased himself away from one of the younger ones who was snoring against his side and stood.

  “Thank you all for the best evening I’ve had in a very long time,” he said softly.

  Big Red stood followed by Rhetta and then they walked to the door. Swift Eagle helped her with her wrap, though he thought perhaps he’d made her mad earlier. Where she had been warm and welcoming, even eager for his company, she now seemed cool and reserved.

  The wind was raw, and it stung when it hit the exposed skin of his face. It was fortunate they lived close together. No one would have to remain in the cold for very long when going h
ome. As for his good fortune, he was grateful. It would be a great thing to sleep inside for a change.

  A puppy lay in front of the door, seeming to be awaiting entry. Rhetta picked it up, cuddled it to her, and then brought it into the house with them.

  Once inside, Swift Eagle looked at the pup, and his eyes widened. “You do know that’s a wolf pup, don’t you?”

  Rhetta smiled. “I sure do. He lost his ma.”

  “Rhetta has brought home many strays. We’ve had a bear cub, rabbits, birds, a raccoon, deer, and now the wolf. Tara told her how she’d once raised a bobcat, and the next thing I knew we had wild animals everywhere.” Big Red chuckled.

  “What do you do with them when they get bigger?”

  “I spend a lot of time outdoors with them, showing them how to forage. When my pa says it’s time for them to leave, the animals are ready. Some still come around, especially Jack. Now Jack is a bear and he should be hibernating, but he never really got the idea of it. He’s gentle, so don’t shoot him.”

  Swift Eagle’s lips tugged upward into a smile. “How am I supposed to know if it’s Jack or another bear?”

  “It’s important you look at the right front leg. It has a small patch of light hair. Now when facing the bear it’s his right not your right. Do you understand or shall I demonstrate?”

  Swift Eagle shook his head. “I see you have your hands full with this woman,” he told Big Red.

  “Woman!” Big Red chuckled but his humor faded, and his face quickly took on a frown. “She’s naught but a little girl still.”

  Swift Eagle tried as hard has he could to keep from laughing. He did a pretty good job, but his lips twitched. Big Red wasn’t ready to admit his daughter was already a woman. That didn’t always bode well for harmony in the family.

  “What’s the pup’s name?” he asked, changing the subject.

  Rhetta glanced at him and smiled. “Actually, he doesn’t have a name, but I’m thinking about calling him Swifty—after you of course. But didn’t people used to think your name was Eagle Nest?”

  “They did. I do not understand how Swift Eagle sounds like Eagle Nest. It didn’t matter, I thought most washichu to be a bit crazy back then.”

  Big Red interrupted the conversation with a big yawn as he stretched his arms over his head. “Best be gettin’ some shut-eye. I’ll show you to your room, Swift Eagle.”

  Swift Eagle picked up his things, which the man who took care of his horse had brought in, and followed Big Red.

  As soon as they entered a bedroom, Big Red narrowed his eyes and leveled his gaze on Swift Eagle. “She is not a woman. She still has nightmares about her time with those Indians. She was ten years old when we got her, and I don’t want her touched, and I don’t want her heart broken. And before you even ask it’s not because you’re Indian, it’s because she’s still young in many ways. She’s not like other girls. She wants to stay on the ranch, she hates dresses, she almost never puts her hair up. She likes to hunt, fish, trap, she’s a great tracker and she loves to play mama to the animals. She can cook and clean with the best of them. The women all saw to that. But she’s lived a sheltered life. The first week we were here, a woman at church called her a dirty Indian. It shocked Rhetta so much she didn’t speak for two weeks. Her family knew we found her, but they couldn’t be bothered to come get her. Now, as I said, I don’t want her hurt, and I see the way she looks at you.”

  Swift Eagle took a startled step back. The way she looked at him. “I’m ten years older than Rhetta. I had not noticed her looking at me, but I will treat her with the care of a young girl. I understand your concerns. I’m not always welcomed at places myself.” He smiled, hoping Big Red understood he could be trusted. “I would like to go hunting with the two of you and maybe see this Jack she spoke of. You’ll see we will be friends and that’s all.”

  Big Red sighed loudly. “I was hoping you’d understand.” He walked to the door. “Good night, then.”

  Swift Eagle nodded.

  As he lay on the bed, he realized that Big Red’s talk made him more aware of Rhetta.

  * * *

  They grabbed her by the arm and threw her face down onto the horse. She’d never been so scared. She tried to move, but the Indian smacked her. At first, she only smelled the horse but as they raced along she smelled the man who took her. It was a putrid smell along with an unwashed odor.

  They finally stopped and she was shoved to the ground. Four Indian men stared at her. One pulled her across the ground by her hair. It hurt. The whole time she prayed. Then he stood her up and started to rip off her clothes.

  “Rhetta, you’re having a nightmare. Rhetta, wake up.” A gentle hand lay on her shoulder, and she bolted upright.

  Her heart pounded, and it was hard to breathe. Tears rolled down her face as she pushed at Swift Eagle. She grabbed her knife from under the pillow and then dropped it as she became aware that it had been another nightmare.

  She put her hands over her face and sobbed. “Where’s Pa?”

  “I was wondering the same thing. He’s not in the house.”

  She drew her legs up and propped her chin on them. “I don’t ever think I’ll be normal, not ever.” She closed her eyes as he hugged her, wrapping his protective arms around her. He made her feel as safe as Pa did, and that had never happened with anyone else. She didn’t sleep at any of the other houses anymore because she’d wake up screaming and they’d have to get her pa.

  “What you went through… it was a terrible thing,” Swift Eagle murmured in a soothing tone.

  “I think my pa is right. He says I’m still a little girl. I doubt many women would wake up crying for their pa. Compared to what Dawn suffered through, what happened to me was nothing. I should be over it.”

  “You were only ten. You can’t compare suffering. Everyone is different in how they feel things and deal with them. Many people have nightmares.”

  Nodding she put her head on his shoulder. “I used to have to sleep outside the teepee if I cried out in my sleep. It didn’t seem to stop the dreams from coming. At least the old man who adopted me gave me a buffalo robe to put on while I was out there. I could see others sharing my fate, but they were shivering. One woman lost all her toes on one foot from the cold.”

  He stroked her back up and down almost absently. “Can I let you go?”

  “Yes, if you sit with me for a few minutes.”

  “Until you fall asleep?”

  Her face burned. “That’s what Pa does.”

  He let go and sat on the side of the bed but farther down near her legs.

  “Why did you really leave your tribe?” she asked after a bit.

  “Perceptive, I see. After meeting Luella, I knew I would never marry a woman from my tribe. None appealed to me. Then I rescued Dawn, and again I saw Luella but this time she was different. She was happy and content with Declan. I was happy for her but sad for myself. I didn’t know where I belonged anymore. There was too much raiding and killing after that, and while I’m not a coward, I didn’t see the need to kill women and children. I had at one time thought to be the next chief, but Kills Many pointed out to the tribe I didn’t go to war against those who wronged us. He didn’t seem to realize when he killed a man more of them came. I’ve seen war and I’ve seen peace, and I wished for peace. I could feel the tribe leaning toward him as the next chief, so I left before he had someone try to kill me.”

  “He’d have done that?”

  “Most likely. I tried being a scout, but my soul told me no. I was leading soldiers to tribes so they could kill them. I decided to go to Canada where there is still plenty of land and hunting. But I came here because I just wanted to see Luella one more time. Sometimes I’d wonder if she was real. I feel a connection to her I thought was love, but it isn’t. I’m not sure what it is.”

  “Didn’t we just have a talk about you staying away from my daughter?” Big Red filled the whole doorway.

  “Pa, I had a nightmare. That’s all.” />
  After a long glare, Big Red sighed. “I’m sorry, Swift Eagle. I shouldn’t have jumped to conclusions.”

  “No harm done.” He stood. “I wish you sweet dreams.”

  Big Red stepped aside to allow Swift Eagle to get by.

  “Was it the same dream?” he asked when they were alone.

  “No, this one was longer. I know how I got this scar.” She pointed to the area of her chest. “A knife was used to cut my clothes off.” Tears poured down her face. “Did they…?”

  Big Red sat on the bed and pulled her close. “No, they didn’t. You were a little girl.”

  “There is much time I can’t remember. It frightens me. Why can’t I remember?”

  “Sometimes when something is just too much for you, your mind keeps it a secret. I’ve seen it before. Most of the time you’re better off not knowing.”

  “Even if it makes me crazy?”

  Big Red cupped her chin and smiled down on her. “Even if it makes you crazy. Now, get some sleep. I heard some of the boys want to make forts in the snow tomorrow, and they’ll want your help.”

  “Being popular can have its drawbacks,” she said with a slight chuckle.

  “That’s my girl.” He kissed her forehead. “Good night, little one.”

  The door closed behind him. He still thought of her as a child and she wanted to be considered an adult. She sighed. That wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

  * * *

  Swift Eagle was the first one up, so he made the coffee the white people enjoyed so much. He brought in a couple armfuls of wood and built the fire up. Although he’d said he would stay for a few days, what was there for him to do? He did see a fence that could be shored up. Or maybe he could shovel out the corral and exercise a few of the horses.

  Big Red entered the kitchen, running his fingers over his beard. “It sure is nice to have the coffee made. Thank you. I want to talk to you about last night. The reason I wasn’t here is that I was with Amy. She has a tiny house of her own and I was there. Maybe I should stop visiting her. Rhetta needs me here.” He poured himself some coffee.